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Merry Stories & Funny Pictures
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The Story of the Inky Boys

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 As he had often done before,
The woolly-headed Black-a-moor
One nice fine summer's day went out
To see the shops, and walk about;

And, as he found it hot, poor fellow,
He took with him his green umbrella
Then Edward, little noisy wag,
Ran out and laughed, and waved his flag,
And William came in jacket trim,
And brought his woollen hoop with him;
And Arthur, too, snatched up his toys
And joined the other naughty boys;
So one and all set up a roar,
And laughed and hooted more and more,
And kept on singing,--only think!--
"Ohl Blacky, you're as black as ink"

Tall Agrippa lived close by

Now tall Agrippa lived close by,--
So tall, he almost touched the sky;
He had a mighty inkstand, too,
In which a great goose feather grew;
He called out in an angry tone,
"Boys, leave the Black-a-moor alone!
For, if he tries with all his might,
He cannot change from black to white."
But ah! they did not mind a bit
What Great Agrippa said of it;
But went on laughing, as before,
And hooting at the Black-a-moor.

Then Great Agrippa foams with rage 


Then great Agrippa foams with rage:
Look at him on this very page!
He seizes Arthur, seizes Ned,
Takes William by his little head;
And they may scream, and kick, and call,
But into the ink he dips them all;
Into the inkstand, one, two, three,
Till they are black, as black can be;
Turn over now and you shall see.


See, there they are, and there they run!

See, there they are, and there they run!
The Black-a-moor enjoys the fun.
They have been made as black as crows,
Quite black all over, eyes and nose,
And legs, and arms, and heads, and toes.
And trousers, pinafores, and toys,--
The silly little inky boys!
Because they set up such a roar,
And teased the harmless Black-a-moor.


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  Monty Mouse's Magic Shop


 Monty is a little mouse, he lives in Fingles Wood
 He has so many different friends, and stores a lot of food.


The Twist-Mouth Family
retold by
S. E. Schlosser

A while back there was a family I know of - a mother, a father, and several children. Four of them had mouths that were twisted into strange shapes. The mother's mouth twisted up while the father's mouth twisted down. The sister's mouth twisted left while the younger brother's mouth twisted right. The eldest son John's mouth was perfectly normal.

When John grew up, his parents sent him to college. He was the first person in his family to get a college education, and everyone was eager to hear what he had to say when he came home from his first vacation. Everyone sat up late talking. When it came time to go to bed, the Mother said: "Papa, I cannot find the candle snuffer. Will you blow out the candle in the sitting room?"

"Yes I will," said the Father. He blew as hard as he could. But his mouth was twisted down so that when he blew, the air tickled his chin.

"Well now, Mama, I think you should blow out the candle," said he.

"Yes I will," said she. She blew as hard as she could. But her mouth was twisted up so that when she blew, the air made her hair stand on end.

"You know, Mary," she said to her daughter, " I think perhaps you should blow out the candle."

"Yes I will," said Mary. She blew as hard as she could. But her mouth twisted to the left, so that when she blew all the air rushed over her cheek.

"Dick, I think tonight you should blow out the candle," said Mary to her younger brother.

"Yes I will," said Dick. He took a deep breath and blew as hard as he could. But his mouth was twisted to the right, so that when he blew all the air went into his right ear.

Then Dick said, "John, maybe you should blow out the candle."

"Yes I will," said John. He blew as hard as he could. And since his mouth was straight, the candle went right out.

They all cheered. Patting John on the shoulder, the father said to his two younger children: "Well now, I hope you both learned how important it is to get a college education."

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 THE CURLY PIG AND THE PUG

The curly Pig and the crinkly Pug
They lived in a sty together,
They lay and snored with their heads on boards,
Through all the sunny weather.

But when the wind blew and the rain fell fast
And the sky was black as ink,
The curly pig gave his friend a dig:
"It's time for a walk, I think."

So they both put on their sou'wester hats
And rain coats spruce and snug,
And paw in paw they trotted along
The curly pig and the crinkly Pug.

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 THE MAGIC OF A NEW SISTER

                      Choosing a Name

I have got a new-born sister;
I was nigh the first that kissed her.
When the nursing woman brought her
To Papa, his infant daughter,
How Papa's dear eyes did glisten!
She will shortly be to christern:
And Papa has made the offer
I shall have the naming of her.

Now I wonder what would please her,
Charlotte, Julia, or Louisa.
Ann and Mary, they're to common;
Joan's too formal for a woman;
Jane's a prettier name beside;

But we had a Jane that died.
They would say if 'twas Rebecca
That she was a little Quaker.
Edith's pretty, but that looks
Better in old English books;
Ellen's left off long ago;

Blanche is out of fashion now.
None that I have named as yet
Are so good as Margaret.
Emily is neat and fine.
What do you think of Caroline?


How I'm puzzled and perplexed

What to choose or think of next!
I am in a little fever
Lest the name that I shall give her
Should disgrace her or defame her.
Hm, I will leave Papa to name her.

Written by the wonderful Charles Lamb, who with Mary made a great contribution to the world of poetry and rhyme.
Diddily.xxx





The Witch-Wood Maid


Fluttering aspens, silver glade,

Where shall I find the Witch-Wood Maid?
Where she wanders, who can tell?
O'er wild thyme and scented dell.

Velvet darkness, gleaming moon-ray,
Past the thorn trees, this way,
that way.

In the silence of the night,
Oft she glides with foot-fall light.

She know all the woodland mystery,
Every elf and goblins' history.
Fairies round her form a ring
Dancing in a circle, sing :-

"You have crossed the Fairies' portal-
Never leave us for thee mortal!
We will give you dreams for life,
Joy for tears, and rest for strife."

 Fairy Tales (Date Unknown)
By D.M.G. Howell



A Beautiful Oak TreeLittle green acorns

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 Tommy and the Magic Tree

        Tommy rubbed his eyes and jumping out of bed he dashed over to the window. Slowly he pulled the curtain to one side, he gazed upon a huge Oak tree. Closing his eyes and then opened them again, yep it was still there. But it hadn't been there yesterday, of that he was sure. Hm if it had have been he would have climbed up it for sure, there was  nothing Tommy liked better than climbing huge, trees.
Slowly he got himself dressed, all the time glancing towards the window to check that the tree was still there. He really wanted to dash down the stairs and outside.... but no, he must take it slowly. He was going to need all of his strength to climb the tree which he intended to do straight after dinner.
He did however rush his breakfast a little, usually he would take ages to decide which cereal he would have but not this morning, this morning it was in with the "snap, crackle and pop" on with milk, and down the hatch.
He chose his shoes carefully , ones with good grips on the soles.

 "Hm the brown ones look best" he said picking them out and putting them on. "There that should do it."  Tommy was up and out in a flash.
He stood there for a little while, just staring at the tree. "Wow, you sure are big Mr Oak," he said and patted the tree gently on its furrowed bark.
       It was no good Tommy couldn't wait any longer... he began to climb. It was so easy, it was as if the branches fitted his hands and in next to no time he was high up amongst the green canopy.
He looked down to see how far he was from the ground. He frowned all around him there where branches, they stretched out in different directions, like small roadways through a jungle. He looked down again to see if he could see the bottom, but there wasn't one. He was lost in a forest in Little green acornsthe sky, he picked a small acorn from the branch and put it in his pocket. He turned to his right and began to walk along the branch closest to him. As he walked the light seemed to fail. It was definitely getting darker.
    "Quick over here!" a voice suddenly called out. Tommy frowned for the only thing near to him was a squirrel'
"You can speak!" Tommy said puzzled.
"Well of course I can speak," snapped the squirrel. "Now listen to me, I have no idea how you got here but I have to warn you that you are in terrible danger."
    "Danger, danger from wh- whom?" Tommy stammered.
    "From the clutches of the evil Wizard of these Woods," the squirrel said quickly, "now listen carefully. A long time ago, a spell had been cst on the forest, and since then it had become an enchanted forest, this was fine no bother but".....
    He looked furtively all around , "The trouble is that every now and then the Wizard of the Wood has a habit of luring someone into the forest, escape I'm afraid is almost impossible."
"But what on earth does he do with all these people, is he lonely?"
The squirrel shook his head and frowned deeply. "Now don't be silly, he wants them so that he can turn them into fertiliser to make the trees grow bigger and stronger."
"Oh my goodness me," murmered Tommy. I think I don't want to become fertili-s what ever you call it. I'm really quite happy being Tommy. Surely you can help me?" He asked shaking his head to try to stop the tears from showing.
"We shall try, the wizard will wake up as soon as it gets dark. Then he will be able to smell your presence and I'm afraid, fertiliser it will be. Come on follow me." The squirrel jumped to the nearest tree, Tommy followed him. "Where are we going."
"To the tallest tree in the forest," the squirrel replied, "Come on, don't waste your breath."
Then eventually stopped climbing, above him Tommy could see the clear twilight sky. He also noticed that all the top leaves were enormous.
"Quickly, quickly, time is running  out, now don't worry just sit on this leaf, and whatever you do, hold on as tight as you can."
Tommy sat on one of the huge leaves. The squirrel whistled, and in a flash the top of the trees were covered in squirrels. They each took hold of the branch to which Tommy's leaf was attached and with a great heave they pulled and pulled. Then suddenly as it seemed the branch would surely break they all let go together and with a mighty TWANG! the branch with Tommy and the leaf attached sprange forward. Tommy and the leaf were launched into the air. High above the trees they soared until, ever so slowly they began to fall slowly to the ground. Down, down, they went till they  landed with a bump.
       Tommy opened his eyes to find himself flat on his bedroom floor. He jumped up and ran over to the window. Nothing there, not a branch, or a leaf, not even a stump. The magic tree was gone. It seems it had gone just as magically as it had arrived.
Tommy turned and left the window, he wondered over to his bed. Maybe it had all been a dream. He lent forward to untie his brown shoes and as he did so there was a click as something fell from his jacket pocket.
He smiled to himself and silently snuggled down into his duvet. In his hand
he held tight  a little green acorn. He smiled quietly to himself and fell back into dreamland.

I found this little story in a childrens treasury story book from 1923. There was no reference to an author I'm afraid.
I have had to alter some of the ways it was written so the children will understand it better.
I think its rather nice and Monty thinks it wondeful. xxx Diddily
THE MAGIC MEDICINE

Mrs Mouse stays in bed

"Whirr, Whirr." went the alarm clock. "Oh bother!" thought Mrs Mouse. "Now I shall have to get out of my nice warm bed, and get breakfast, pack the children off to school, then clean and sweep, How I wish I could always stay here, snug and cosy."
When, at last, she hopped out of bed and peeped out of the window, it was a cold, foggy morning.
"I believe I'm not well," said Mrs Mouse; "I have a distinct pain." So she slipped back into bed again and Mr Mouse got up and dressed the children, got breakfast ready, then took Mrs Mouse hers on a nice little tray, with the best china and the largest portion of jam.
       Next day Mrs Mouse had another look out of the window, but it was hailing; so Mrs Mouse said, "I am sure I am very unwell, I must  get back to my warm bed at once." Which she did and Mr Mouse gave her his night-cap to keep out the draught, and sent for a neighbour to nurse her.
He gave his wife all his share of butter and jam, then he and the children did all the work, making Mouse Cottage quite tidy and clean.
The next morning when the clocck went "Whirr, Whirr," Mrs Mouse sighed heavily at being disturbed, but she hopped up, all the same to look at the weather: "For I am always one to do my duty," she said. But this morning  it was snowing, so Mrs Mouse knew it was her duty to get back into bed at once: "For I am really and truly very ill." said she, "and I have a most distinct pain."
Even a Hot-water bottle       So her husband got her a nice hot-water bottle to keep her toes warm, as well as the night-cap to keep out the draught; and she ate all the butter and jam and most of the toast. Mr Made her a lovely jelly as well to keep up her strength. Then he went off to see Dr Nippett because the neighbour said he was very clever and would certainly be able to cure Mrs Mouse.
       He found him sitting in his consulting room reading a big book, with the aid of a pair of horn-rimmed spectacles.
       The Doctor was very kind to poor Mr Mouse, who by this time was quite desperate and very tired with doing all the work and nursing Mrs Mouse as well. Dr Nippett made him sit in a big arm chair and describe all his wife's symptons. When the Doctor heard how ill she felt when she got out of bed and found it so cold, and such a lot to do, he said he was sure he could cure her, and he would come round at once. Poor Mr Mouse felt cheered at the good news and went off to his work, and Dr Nippett twirled his whiskers, and taking his top hat and bag he went to see Mrs Mouse.
       The invalid was glad when the distinguished Doctor arrived, and told him all about her being unwell (but she didn't mention all the hot toast, jam and jelly she had eaten).
       Dr Nippett looked at her tongue and felt her pulse, then told her to say "99." Then he said "Cheer up, my dear Mrs Mouse, I'm quite sure I can cure you. I have a wonderful medicine which will act like magic. One dose will be enough, but it is very, very nasty medicine to take -  so nasty, that I had better bring my partner to-morrow to hold your nose and drench you, if you cannot swallow it."
        When the doctor had gone, Mrs Mouse became very thoughtful. She began to wonder what ther medicine would taste like, and if she would be able to swallow it; or would they have to hold her nose and pour it down her throat.The Doctor and his Medicine
            In the evening Mrs Mouse said to her husband when he came home from work, "I am so much better today, my distinct pain has quite gone. I think I shall be able to get up tomorrow."
        And sure enough, before the clock went "Whirr, Whirr," Mrs Mouse was out of bed; and although it was hailing, raining and snowing, she got Mr Mouse a lovely breakfast. When Doctor Nippett arrived with his partner and a huge bottle of black medicine, he found, Mrs Mouse sweeping and cleaning with energy. She told him his medicine was so wonderful, that even thinking about it had acted like magic, and she would not waste any of the precious stuff by taking even a tiny dose.
        And I do believe it really was magic for Mrs Mouse has not had a days illness since.    

D.M.G.Howell

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                   Monty Mouse's Magic Shop
 
 Monty is a little mouse,
he lives in Fingles Wood
    He has so many different friends,
and stores a lot of food.

He owns a very special shop
  Where many spells are cast,
And if you're very,very good
wand
He'll make you one that last's

But do beware when you go inside
That you take along some cheese
or you might come out as something else,
A big fat rat, or a dog with fleas





 
THE MAGIC KADAHI (PAN)
GRANDPA'S STORIES
WELCOME YOU.


Once upon a time there was a small village. Salma with her sweet little daughter lived in a small cottage in the village. They were very happy and contented.  Salma had a magic kadahi (pan), which was given to her by a sage who had come to the village just after Salma was married. This pan was a big support to Salma and her daughter.
 At mealtime Salma would put the pan on the stove and say: " Pan. O Pan! Please cook. And quickly too. I am hungry. Cook some porridge." No sooner these words were said than boiling porridge would appear in the pan and the pan would start filling up with it. When there was enough porridge for both Salma and her daughter Salma would say: Pan, O Pan! Please stop. And quickly too. Our stomachs are full. And thank you too." The moment these words were uttered the pan would stop cooking and Salma would place it on the table and she and her daughter would eat their fill. Salma would then say, "Pan, O Pan! Clean thyself. We are full for now. And thank you too." The pan would then become sparkling new and Salma would put it away, Rahimchacha was Salma's neighbor and a very inquisitive man. He often said to himself, " Salma and her daughter seem very well fed and healthy, but I never hear the rattle of pots and pans which is and indication of someone cooking. I also have never seen her washing her pots and pans ever. The question is do they cook?
If they do then when do they cook and as I have never seen her buying any foodstuff, what do they cook?"
Rahimchacha was astonished as the pan went to work and it filled up with boiling porridge. He was afraid of being seen and quietly left at this point and said to himself, "Ah! Now I know the secret of Salma's affluence and her cooking. I am going to take away this magic pan when Salma and her daughter go out."
Next day when Salma and her daughter went out to work, Rahimchacha crept into their house and stole the pan. He came back to his house, went into his kitchen, put the pan on the stove and said: "Pan O Pan! Please cook. And quickly, too. I am hungry. Cook some porridge."
Boiling porridge appeared in the pan and the pan started filling up with it. The pan was soon full. Rahimchacha who had only heard the words that began the cooking did know the magic words that would tell the pan to stop cooking. So he said, " All right enough, please stop cooking……"
The pan did not stop cooking. The porridge began to overflow and spill out from the pan. The whole kitchen floor was full of porridge, and then the other rooms filled and the porridge started flowing out on the streets. Rahimchacha watched helplessly and then began to run away from the boiling flowing porridge.

The porridge was chasing Rahimchacha wherever he

went. Rahimchacha now alarmed ran helter skelter shouting for help, " Please! Somebody please help me! Somebody please come and say something to this pan. The whole village will fill up with it. The crows will fill the village to eat it. The village and my house will drown in porridge!"
The porridge continued to overflow and chase Rahimchacha wherever he went.



Meanwhile Salma and her daughter came home. When she saw the street in front of her house filled with porridge she knew what had happened. She walked into Rahimchacha's kitchen; Lo and Behold the porridge made a place for her to walk through. She went up to the pan and whispered to it, " Pan O Pan! Please stop. And quickly, too. Our stomachs are full. And thank you too."


    The pan stopped cooking. Rahimchacha said to Salma, "Please forgive me. I had become greedy. So I stole your pan. Now I do not want this pan or the porridge it cooks. Please pardon me for my behavior."


Rahimchacha had not heard the words Salma had spoken to the pan. Even now he has nightmares and wakes up in fright as he sees the porridge chasing him.

Thankyou once more to my wonderful Indian friends for this amazing story.

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Welcome to "Lejo". Diddily thinks this is one of the funniest video's she has put together.

I love it to bits and no matter how I try, I still can't do the finger magic.


 


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The Witch's Brew

"What have you got in your cauldron?" asked an elf, as he perched on the fence well out of the witch's reach. She was sitting on a thre-legged stool, and bending over a huge black cauldron, the contents of which was just coming to the boil, dimpling and bubbling, foaming and sizzling in a most mysterious and fascinating manner.
       It was a hot stuffy evening, so the witch was doing her cooking out of doors in her little front yard; which was just as well, for as the cauldron boiled and bubbled it threw off a horrible smell - at least, so the elf thought.
       He watched curiously as the scum rose to the black surface, and the witch skimmed it off into a big dish.
A stag-beetle came to see whether the scum tasted good, so she popped him into the boiling cauldron without so much as a by your leave .
       The elf watched him floating and struggling in the horrid brew, and edged farther down
the fence.
"What have you got in your pot?" asked the elf again.
       "It is rude to ask questions,"  said the witch, "you have not been well brought up," and she made a dab at him with the ladle. But he was at a safe distance now  and not to be frightened away, though the black cat hissed and spat at him.
       "That's right, Tom!" chuckled the witch. "We'll teach him manners  if he isn't careful. "This is "Contrary Mixture" if you must know Mr Inquisitive," she snapped at the elf. "He who takes a dose of this black brew becomes the very opposite of what he was before - if handsome, he grows plain; if clever, he becomes stupid; if generous, he becomes miserly; and so on."
      
"It's quite  my own invention," added the witch proudly, as she took the cauldron off the fire to cool.
   
The Witch's Brew   "How will you turn them back again into their former selves?" asked the elf, interested.
"Oh, I have nothing that will undo the spell, at the moment," answered the witch, "I may invent that later on."

       The elf slid down the palings, and ran off into the greenwood to his supper. While he ate it, his neighbour, a gnome, came in to gossip.
       Have you heard the very latest?" he asked as he smoked his pipe. "The Primrose Fairy Princess is in great disgrace, she has refused to marry the Gnome King's youngest son because he is so ugly, and has a humped back and a wart on his nose. She is to be given another chance tomorrow and then if she still refuses, she is to be banished to the bog country for life."
       The elf was horrified to hear of the dreadful fate in store for the poor Primrose Princess. She was always kind and friendly, and the elves were very fond of her. He thought about it long after the gnome had said good-night, and the moon was high above the woods. At last he got a big idea.
       The elf put on a dark cloak and set out for the witch's house, taking with him a little glass bottle and a cork. When he reached it (looking very gloomy among the black yew
trees), he slipped over the palings and stood listening in the little yard.
       His heart went pit-a-pat, pit a pat, for he was terribly frightened. Then he heard a loud snore, followed by another and another.
       "Good luck, she is asleep," thought the elf, and tip-toed towards the cauldron, now quite cold. By standing on the stool he could just manage to reach the black mixture and dip his bottle in. When it was full he put in the cork very tightly, and had just climbed the palings when he heard a loud hiss. The little elf never stopped to look but he fled for his life, knowing it was the
the Black Cat. witch's cat. He ran and ran, not halting till he reached the gnome's underground palace. The elf asked the sentry if he might be taken straight to the humpbacked Prince; and when he was allowed to see him, the elf told him all that he had heard, and what the Witch's Brew could do.
        The Gnome Prince, who was heart broken at the Princess refusing to marry him, and very tired of being so ugly, swallowed the mixture, although the smell and taste made him pull funny faces. The elf squeaked with joy and excitement, for he saw the Prince change before his very eyes, from the ugliest of gnomes in the Kingdom to a very handsome and gallant looking Prince.
    
The Primrose Princess    Before sun-rise they set off together in the royal carriage drawn by field mice, to visit the Primrose King and to hear the Princess's last answer. There was great surprise and excitement when they were announced, for no one recognised the deformed gnome in the handsome Prince. The guards forgot to salute, the pages to trumpet, and the  Primrose Princess fainted away with relief and joy. But they soon brought her to with nectar, and when she was asked once more, and for the last time, whether she would be the gnome Prince's bride, she did not hesitate in saying Yes.
       The Witch was furious that her noisome brew had done so much good, and she is still trying to invent something to alter matters, but so far, in vain!
   
I do love these little stories
Fairy Tales, date unknown, D.M.G.Howell.
A Four Leaf CloverA Four Leaf Clover
Four Leaf  Clover


Not only boys and girls, but many older folk, when out in the country, when they come across a path of clover have to bend down and search for a four leaf clover. Most clover leaves are divided into three sections but occasionally the lucky finder of a four leaf, start whooping about shouting that he or she have found the lucky leaf. My mother was one of the worse, she loved searching for one and was convinced that good fortune would come her way. I can't ever remember if it did but it made her happy and so we were all happy too.I'm a funny four leaf clover      
          

There is a story I know about a worthy old lady who had a nephew who lived with her. The nephew loved to keep rabbits, and looked after them tenderly.     
Now his Aunt had great belief in the fortune of the Four Leaf Clover  and when she used to go walking she strived to find them till she ended up with quite a bunch of the little leaves.
 She kept her leaves safe by carefully pressing them in her books and putting them into a cupboard in order to keep her well.

           One day however the nephew found himself very short of money and he didn't have enough food for his rabbits. Somehow he came across his Aunt's store of Lucky Clover leaves, and being delighted that his beautiful pets wouldn't have to go hungry, he gathered up as many of the leaves as he could find and gave them to his pets.
            By and by the old lady found a few more lucky leaves and when she went to  put them with the others, but when she found  all her luck gone she worried so much that she made herself very ill and almost died.
Fortunately the nephew  searched the fields for more Lucky Clover Leaves and with each one he replaced so his Aunt got better.
           
I'm a funny four leaf clover  There is a moral to this small story, because  she believed the Clover Leaves kept her healthy she also believed that when they vanished it actually made her that ill  that she almost died.
              I think it is better to trust yourself  than trust in superstitions.

The idea of the clover leaf bringing good luck is a very old one and it is found in many countries all over the world.
You can even buy little clover seeds to grow your own 4 leaf clover

Inside the ingenious box are plant seeds, a compost pellet and a terracotta pot - everything required to get growing.
www.prezziesplus.co.uk/user/products/lg-grow


Did you know that you can also find a Two Leaf Clover .
These are said to bring good luck to the finder.
There is a rhyme that goes;
A clover, a clover of two,
put it into your right shoe.
Doing this was supposed to protect the wearer against injury.
                                                           
A New Year Holiday CardGraphically striking 1911 New Year's postcard, offering greetings and showing a pretty child bearing a basket of four-leaf clover! 
Romantic mistletoe and a golden horseshoe for good luck complete the picture.  
A desirable holiday collectible in very good condition! www.vintagepostcards.org/year-greetings-fanta.

The Four Leaf Clover however was not thought to be a charm, it was they said, the Four Leaf Clover resembled a Cross and the cross protected the
owner against  evil spirites and witches.

Some girls placed the four leaf clover under their pillow in the hope they would meet a man to marry.


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